I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
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