Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
