Betty ford says i'm here all night
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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