Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
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