lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
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