i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Randomize
