Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
now i know why i became what i already was.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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