so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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