time to smoke my breakfast
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Randomize
