i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
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