I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize