The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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