so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Randomize
