does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
