Kiss
Puke
it was like his penis was on wheels.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Randomize