if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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