i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
