I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize
