My first STD was from a foam party
she looked like the before picture.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Randomize
