I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Randomize
