I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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