just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
