Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
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