Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
