i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
