have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Randomize
