i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
