i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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