Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
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