And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
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