There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
