DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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