I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
