i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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