Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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