i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
