Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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