he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
