i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
