I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Farmville is her only friend.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Randomize
