Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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