I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
