I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
