she woke up with a sticky ear
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Randomize
