Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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