omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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