So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
