I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize