The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
