Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
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