even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
