my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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